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On that evening, in an effort to understand the crime, I had decided to try to imagine her as a sex object, and I had found that task easier than I would like to admit. She'd been wearing a tight pair of jeans that disclosed a slight swell beginning to develop in her adolescent hips. Her breasts were just starting to develop as well, and they poked through her T-shirt like a pair of ripening apricots. And the musical sound of her laughter when she and my blonde daughter shared a private joke easily pierced my heart. Yes, she was certainly attractive, even sexy. It wasn't so hard to see how someone like Johnson might be taken with her. But that's all the more reason to control it!If all men, as I suspect, feel some attraction toward adolescent girls, then those who are weak, who give in to such urges, fail as men. Johnson's crime was to act upon his thoughts. Despicable! In contrast, I doubt whether a tawdry thought had ever crossed that poor young girl's mind, and it is the creeps. I might state at this point that never before had I been in the position of having a young lady touching me in that way. Nor would anyone else have done so. I had touched myself frequently, I admit.I felt I should not, but I had been in receipt of conflicting advice from two of my uncles. Uncle Robert suggested that I should not 'abuse myself' for fear of blindness, infection and eternal damnation. You'll understand that I was reluctant to commit to these consequences. Uncle Garrison, a bachelor, and popular man with the womenfolk, refuted Robert's claims, insisting that the singular consequence of self-abuse was discovery. "Men of style," he said to me, as an aside at a gathering, "are not caught with their pants at half-mast, nor with their mast at full salute, Sir." He added, later in the evening and having partaken in considerable wine, that he was himself without style, and the lady he had his arm around was in full agreement with him.In any case, neither the history nor the.
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